How to Poop While Dating Without Killing the Romance

Methat’s beautiful reach the point of relationship when you’re no longer new partner finally all found Choose to stick with you despite the horrible smell your body producesHowever, you don’t want this stinking point to arrive ahead of schedule. It tragically kills romance so quickly.

A little about me: I’m irrational shy bladderMost of the time, pooping outside your own home is out of the question. One of my worst nightmares him is clogging.my dating oil My house.work on this Fear has given me some expertise when it comes to poop-related damage control.that’s whyThere are ways to poop on a date without embarrassing yourself in front of your romantic prospects.

When you have to poop on site

Let’s start by assuming that “holding on to it” is no longer an option. It sounds stressful, but it’s actually preferred to working from one of your homes.Find a public restroom you can casually come across and avoid entering Easy enough if you can respond quickly enough that they don’t have much time to think about what you’re going to do.

Worst case scenario is you are at their house. Here are the basics of separate pooping in a date’s bathroom:

• Make sure the toilet is working first. gives an experimental ffresh.
• Keep the sink running and the bathroom fan on while you’re doing the act.

• Practice what my dad calls “curtsy flash,” aka “flash as you go.” The goal here is Your toilet never faces an end load it can’t handle. (Admittedly, the downside is that your date may hear you flash multiple times — which I would argue is better than if/when Can’t flash at all. )
• wait for them to Use the restroom first.do after you go whatever you can do to allow what you did time to settle. Start engaging in highly persuasive conversations, or perhaps impromptu games, or snuggling on the couch.Ask if you can help prepare dinner or clear the dishes. If you go out, Just before we both go home, let’s poopso you can get the hell out of there before they catch your whim.

Consider carrying in the future Deodorants(like P.oo-Pmelon) to ease your mind.

If the toilet clogs during a date

First things first: stop flashing. Unclogging a toilet is one thing, but an overfilled toilet is a whole different problem. If it’s closer to the rim for your comfort level, Reach behind the toilet bowl and twist the silver metal knob to turn off the water.

Look for drain cleaner under the sink. Pour it in, let it sit for a few minutes, and start cleaning things up.

If you have a plunger: Make sure the angle of the plunger points upwards. Drill a hole and move it up and down until the water level begins to move, signaling that the blockage has begun to be successfully cleared.

No plunger? unclog toilet with plastic bag.

Spread the load with soap and water. This requires finding a way to transport hot water from the sink to the bowl. Pour some hand soap or detergent into a bowl and pour as much hot water as possible to make it easier to drown.

Remove poop by hand. aDisable this option except in the most extreme circumstances.I actually have a hard time imagining a scenario bad enough to risk being found handful of my own excrement. Make sure you have a disposal plan in place. Are there windows in the bathrooms? where does that window lead? Can you “run to the car” right out of your date’s bathroom? (The uncertainty involved here shows why this tack should be considered an absolute last resort.) Then fIndia Some kind of buffer to go to Between your hand and your cargo—A wad of toilet paper may be your only recourse—I will put it together as soon as possible. be sure to wash with lots of soap and water, obviously.

if you need to escape

If you can feel a horrible stint starting in the bathroom, you can always escape before you risk destroying your date’s bathroom. Serious enough to justify you leaving, gentle enough in terms of personal karma, and assuring your date that they don’t have to do anything to help your fake situation We need something vague enough to

My go-to lie is something like “a friend who had a panic attack.” (Yes, I am a bad person.) Although this situation is urgent, it does not mean that you must continue to lie in the future. Nor is it something your date will conscientiously bring up when meeting that friend.

of course,Leeing is only a viable option Previous you use the toilet Don’t run away after creating an irreparable blockage. That’s very crappy.

or, choose honesty

Whatever you do, don’t ruin someone’s bathroom and run away from it. Be candid and explain that you need to get supplies or whatever you need to unclog your toilet. You can show your sexy level of confidence.

we all poop. Your date should be well aware of this fact.If not, I think you can shed some light on them with some children’s literature about the problem.