How to host an orgy

There’s nothing new about sex parties. Bonobos have been orgy even before people existed, and the earliest evidence of human group sex dates back to the Neolithic fertility festivals.Sex parties have been a spring tradition every yearDon’t let me start about ancient Egypt, and how the Greeks and Romans got off, their perverted motherfuckers.

If you decide to join this epic tradition, it’s good for you. However, there are some special considerations for hosting this type of do before sending a group invitation to the Astronomy Club.

I talked to a couple of OG Orgy — Veteran Adult Industry Journalist Gramponante Certified intimate educators and event organizers Stella Harris— How to get a scoop About hosting bacchanal in your own neighborhood. These two organized dozens of parties that I would never be invited to. Orgy, sex parties, near-sex parties, and other expressions of sensuality and group identity.

Who should be invited to the orgy?

Every party is as good as a guest, but orgy has some requirements that Kentucky Derby parties don’t have. As a host, it is your responsibility to keep your guests safe and happy. So don’t scribble your address on the bathroom wall or invite all your Facebook friends. You must be insightful. This is probably not the time to know if you are vibrating with someone new. Instead, make sure the invitee is in your circle of social trust.

“At a house party … generally, you’re only there if someone guarantees you. You’re a friend of the host or the date of a friend of the host. Therefore, at least one or two people of this kind. We already guarantee the ability to handle the space in the space, “says Harris.

Harris recommends that you carefully consider the personality and reputation of the invitee. “You want to think about what you know about people. First, are they even games for this kind of thing? If so, how do gender and sexuality match? Because I want people To play with everyone … Who is a good, clear communicator? Who knows that they are good at consenting? Who will appear on time? Who will meet the demands of others? “

Ponante points out that the audience for his sexy Saturnalia festival is surprisingly diverse. “There is a through line through the types of people who attend sex parties. It’s a shame because there is no better term-“Resistance” he said Said. “When you get a group of people who don’t necessarily feel embarrassed, it doesn’t necessarily indicate which part of the racial, economic, or political spectrum they belong to.”

Keep your guest list small, especially if your idea is to have a truly shared experience. “Sex parties are rarely really free,” explains Harris. “If it’s just a pile of bodies and everything is doing something to each other, I think we can probably have up to five people.” People who are more than a quintet and socialize at parties where clothing is mandatory. Will probably be divided into smaller groups, such as.

Notify and warn guests

Don’t invite people who don’t know it’s a sex party to a sex party.Do not throw regularly The dinner party you are having hope Turns into an orgy — that shit only works in porn movies. Then talk openly with the guest about what they can expect from the beginning.

“We need to make sure everyone understands what we’re signing up for, which starts with an invitation to the event,” says Harris. “You tell people,” Hey, friends, this may sound a bit strange, but I’m having a sexy party, and you’re invited. ““

If you’re like me, many of your friends are open spaces that don’t like to participate in orgies. After all, it’s a little scary. In that case, Harris suggests an intermediate step between the party and the orgy: A sexy A party as opposed to a full-fledged sex party. “For beginners who are used to sexy spaces, it’s very helpful to have an introductory event.“Harris said. “For example,’watch pornography together’,’read erotica together’, etc.”

Relieve your organizational expectations

Unless you have participated in it, your concept of orgy is probably based on a depiction of the practice of popular culture.According to my group sex experts, those depictions are very inaccurate: it won’t be like a porn movie, and it won’t be like Eyes Wide Shut..

“Pornography of sex parties is actually a Hague-level crime.N.――――Level crime, “Ponante told me. “I had a porn star at my party, and if you watch one of their sex party porn movies, then see how they behave at a real sex party, it’s Day and night. No one screams or cries in a gangbang. The way some porn movies portray these things, they are fatally serious. But in reality, they are really fun. People laugh. ”

Preparing for an important day

Once the most fascinating cads and dashing rebuke on your contact list confirms attendance at your dream sex party, IIt’s time to get into the details: food, Drinks, and theme.

Orgy grab

As with any party, you need to serve your guests, but when creating an orgy menu, keep in mind the specific needs and activities of the group-exploring. For example, don’t put peppers in a large pot.

“If you’re not careful, everyone just brings dessert,” Harris jokes. “It’s a joke that you always have treats and people don’t always think about what foods go well with sex. You need something that’s not too cluttered, like finger food style … you Must definitely have protein and energy foods. “

“We cooked bacon-wrapped or other small amounts of protein catered for. No garlic, no dairy products. Individually wrapped, no delicatessen,” said Ponante. I added.

Liquor and drugs

It is ultimately up to the host / t to offer or allow drugs and alcohol at the sex party.He lIt’s aw, but you need to be careful when approaching it. Mental-changing substances can relax people, but they can also blur boundaries.

“You try not to mix a lot of drugs and a lot of alcohol with the orgy,” Ponante said. “One is a performance issue and two may be a consent issue … I drank white wine once because everyone thinks it’s a chick drink. But white wine gives you a little buzz and doesn’t stain your teeth. “

Whether to make it a theme or not?

Whether you want to set a specific theme for your party is “it’s going to be crazy. Orgy!! It really depends on who you roll with. If your friends are interested in Renfair, the medieval theme may be fun (although if you’re friends with Renfair people, you won’t need any help in planning an orgy)... If you’re hanging out with a historian, maybe the Roman orgy theme will work?

Last note: yours, regardless of liquor or decoration Well home.. Hire a maid if you are lazy.Nobody wants to get down to the pigStye.

Graceful hosting for a comprehensive fuck fest

Gentle and decorative party hosting Lost art, but strangely enough, in the 1950s skill set, warmly greeting guests and making them feel welcome is essential to a successful orgy...

“Organizers need to repeat and welcome everyone, whatever the basic rules of the event, which may be a way to handle communication and consent,” Harris says. ..

“I [a porn star who shall remain nameless] For a while, he helped me host some of these parties. She went to talk to the shy guys and I talked to the shy women, but we both got the same sex reassurance, Too, “said Ponante. “I’m talking to the girls.’Hey, thank you for digging the ditch.’ I just make everyone as comfortable as possible.”

Try to avoid leaving socially annoying people alone unless that is what they want. Both Harris and Ponante have suggested the possibility of combining an experienced hand with a green horn.

Group introduction is important

Breaking the ice is essential for a sex party. Don’t wait for guests to get to know each other and get busy: YYou are the host and you need to be the catalyst. Both Harris and Ponante proposed a group introduction. This has two purposes. This means you can make your guests more comfortable and schedule.

“As you may say, people can arrive until 9 pm.m.We will exchange snacks and cocktails until 10 o’clock.m. And at 10p.m.The opening circle will start, “Harris said.

At Harris’s party, the circle is when everyone says their name, their pronouns, perhaps their sexuality, and what they want to get out of the night... You can also ask guests to provide information about sexually transmitted diseases, relationships, safety needs, and information that may be relevant to you or other guests.

Party Sex Party

If your party is for an experienced Libertine, everyone will know the deal, but beginners may need a little help. Harris Ancient sexy game “Spin The Bottle”.

“It sounds ridiculous, but spinning the bottle is a very good icebreaker,” says Harris. “My group is playing the latest version of the game with a focus on consent. When you land on someone, you suggest something and they either accept your suggestion or give the opposite suggestion. So instead of putting pressure on someone to kiss, it’s a little practice negotiation, so I landed on someone and said, “Hey, how about a kiss?‘, And they say, “In fact, I would prefer a hug.”

If this is your first time orgy

If you are invited to an orgy You should feel better about yourself — someone thinks you can treat yourself or others — but check only you Attend with the right attitude. As well as self-confidence, openness to new experiences is good. Sex positives are given.Creepy Certainly a non-starter.

If you’re a beginner, Harris emphasizes the importance of participating with specific goals in mind, so don’t be disappointed. “You should think, “Wet your feet. I’m going to understand this,‘”She says,” You should assemble it like this, “Oh, well, I can’t believe I was invited to an orgy, and I’m all these hot people You can see it doing it! “It’s already a victory. So, provide people with a light meal or give them a bottle of lubricating oil. “

According to Ponante, another important guest attribute is self-confidence. “It’s not Bragadosio,” he said. Assumption Being there. Take the test or answer the correct question on the form … Do not hide the light under the light below. “

“Get ready to be late,” Harris said. “Prepare to see at least in the first half of the evening, The culture and atmosphere of the people in this group. ”

According to Harris It’s important to understand how guests treat communication and what the party’s rules, norms and activities are. It is also important to have a deeper idea of ​​sex and a healthy respect for other guests than our pure culture often offers.

“Just because someone comes to a sex party doesn’t mean you want to do everything with everyone,” says Harris. “Someone may want to go to a sex party and have hand sex, or play with sex toys, so if someone appears and just wants to put a penis in a person, the possible play The types are limited. Possible combinations of people. “

To soul Orgy

Successful orgy requires inviting interesting groups to get along with, serving the right snacks and drinks, becoming a graceful host / hostess, and providing fun activities. If it sounds like a recipe for a successful party of any kind, you’re right, but there’s an important difference from a sex party. According to practice fans, orgy is a potentially transformative experience in a way that has few dinner parties.

“There is no such thing as casual sex” Ponante explains. “Even if sexual encounters are as crazy or spontaneous as possible, it still makes sense. The idea is that people can change in a safe environment. People can be blown away in a safe environment. It’s really exciting. The way you want to see what’s happening in an ant colony. You may leave a different person than when you entered. “