According to therapists, how couples should decide if counseling is worth it

MArrival counseling can be difficult, but it is often wise to invest time in your relationship to see if it can be improved. about 44% of couples go to marriage counseling Before tying the knot.Studies also suggest couple therapy Positive impact on 70% of couples I am being treated. Couple counselors are not biased in design, so if you want to solve a problem with a loved one, they can provide an outside perspective. It’s also a plus to have an external perspective from someone who is highly trained in relationships. But how do you know that it’s right for you?

Signs that you and your partner may need couple counseling

Doctor Gavin ShaflonNew York State Licensed Psychologist and Couple Counselor Clarity Therapy NYCThere are many reasons why couples can start counseling, one of which is constant conflict. “We often see couples coming to treatment when they come across the same repetitive discussions over and over, or when they are concerned about the sustainability and health of their current dynamics.”

Dr. SarihababaAlFrozen marriage and family tHerapist WhenUthor Related books for parenting Let’s take a closer look at this. “I have a couple who come in and notice that they are … in conflict and they feel nervous. You don’t necessarily have to fight, but you still have tension in your body. Something. But I feel sick, she hasn’t heard, she might say she hasn’t caught me. “This distinction is important.Because it may be clear if there are a lot of outward fights, this general tension is often It was overlooked.

According to Baba, counseling is about respecting each other’s differences and finding compromises. From time to time, couples may not have “a language or way of speaking to each other because they are so involved in their differences.”

Communication skills are the basis of healthy relationships. Remember that the decision to get treatment is entirely yours, but if you are suffering from communication problems, counseling is a good place to start.

What to do if you still don’t understand

If you or your partner are still uncertain whether couple counseling is right for you, it’s time to reflect on it. Shafron recommends that you consider the following: “WHat challenge [you or your partner] What about the idea of ​​getting into counseling? “

He continued. “For some people, the lack of preparation is very present, as something can come out during the course of treatment, further upsetting their relationship or, in the worst case, ending the relationship. It’s possible. For others, it can be embarrassing about the problems that exist in their behavior and their relationships. Sometimes it can be a combination of several factors. ”

These assumptions can definitely hinder the pursuit of treatment, but keep in mind that couple counselors are trained to be neutral. Two useful questions to ask yourself before starting treatment are whether you feel that the issues in your relationship have already been resolved or that you are feeling a change. needs Occur.Ultimately, the goal of treatment is always to build new communication skills and heal wounds. together..

Baba We also recommend that you investigate as much as possible in advance. Not only does this mean a quick search on Google, but it can actually mean calling a few therapists to see if it suits you. “Most therapists I know make 5 to 10 minutes of phone calls. You can ask a question to see if it’s a good place to start from scratch. She also recommends trying at least three sessions before deciding that she doesn’t suit her.

When is couple therapy worthless?

Counseling is not always suitable for everyone. As Baba explained, “It’s back to what you’re looking for in counseling. If you think it’s a simple solution like a pill, it may not work. It’s a process. Be proactive in the process. Need to be involved. ”

Shaflon adds: This is not the best use of couple counseling, as therapy does not change the personality or personality of others in order for relationships to work. You make an effort (in some cases) It may be time to consider the difficult tasks associated with couple counseling, and then other options.

Ultimately, initiating couple therapy is a decision that needs to be made by both partners. It requires some remorse, but if you are ready to make an effort, it can incredibly heal your relationship.