Best Ways to Respond to Unfair Feedback at Work

I had an interaction with my boss earlier in my career that I now regret. She started saying, “I want to give you feedback on your work.” She had a list in front of her and she started explaining all the things she felt I wasn’t doing well. She barely made eye contact and had a deadpan tone. i was angry

The first three were tasks I wasn’t responsible for. My colleague had those obligations. The rest of the feedback was about deliverables that others said were high quality, so it was unexpected. I worked for her for almost a year and she never said I was doing something wrong not only did she feel cheated but half that was completely wrong. Corrected her on her inaccurate items, but kept silent on others. I left the meeting upset and discouraged. I decided she was a bad boss, held a grudge against her, and quit full-time grad school immediately.

Sure, I could blame my boss. Her approach to giving feedback was sombre. But what I’ve learned is that we can’t control her boss’ abilities, we can only control their reactions to them. Moreover, her boss makes mistakes. Not perfect. But what I regret most is not sticking around to talk about it. Instead, I acted impulsively. Speaking up when receiving inaccurate or unfair feedback is a skill anyone can develop. I have and you can too. Here are some tips.

what to say when your boss criticizes your work

Often, when we hear feedback, our first reaction is to agree or disagree with it. Do neither. Instead, say thank you, even if it’s unfair or inaccurate. Most bosses are bad at giving feedback and may be afraid of your reaction. Saying thank you helps neutralize each other’s feelings. It also demonstrates a willingness to demonstrate maturity and professionalism. It might sound like “thank you for pointing that out”.

If your heart is pounding or you have a strong reaction, you might say: Could you give me a moment to process this? ” Giving yourself the time and space to consider feedback is beneficial, and demonstrating your ability to receive it well is even more effective.

ask questions and take notes

When your emotions cool down, it’s easier to ask questions and interact. Find examples and context. Ask about your manager’s expectations and how your performance, especially your work, has not met expectations. Is this him a one time issue or a recurring pattern of behavior?

The more insight you can gain into how your boss evaluates you, the more targeted you can be in dealing with it. Also, remember that this is an evaluation of your job performance, not you as a person.Keep your mindset focused on the job. Continuing to beat yourself up and get discouraged won’t help you move forward.

Ask for other feedback

Your boss’s opinion is one data point. That’s important, but it’s still just one person’s point of view. Seek feedback from trusted colleagues and assess its importance. Let’s say your boss thinks you’re always late for meetings, but you disagree. Ask your colleagues. If they agree, we know this is a big problem. If not, make sure you are on time for all future meetings with your manager.

This is having the ability to adapt your behavior to the expectations of others. This is a skill that will serve you throughout your career.

step into their shoes

Try to empathize with your boss. This is asking for understanding of their experience. Do they have a lot of work to do? What kind of person is the manager? they Have? Are they under a lot of pressure? Is it possible they were just having a bad day when they gave you unfair feedback?

Giving your boss the benefit of the doubt isn’t just helpful. It’s humane. This was my biggest regret in my interaction. I remember my boss being under a lot of pressure. We all worked long hours. I could have given her more of her grace, instead I held a grudge.

Intentionally Respond to Feedback

This was the advice I received many years later. Make it clear to your boss that you are acting on it. Let’s say your boss thinks you’re not a team player and that you don’t communicate well with the team. Tell your manager after working more closely with your colleagues. It may sound like this. It was a good meeting. We plan to hold regular meetings. Your boss may be busy and forget to pay attention to your efforts. It helps to be clear about your efforts.

You are expected to get corrective feedback on your work. Information for improving performance, but sometimes it feels wrong or unfair. How you handle it is an indicator of your ability to maintain positive and productive relationships at work. This feedback is definitely stinging, but keeping your emotions in check and talking to your boss and others before taking action can put you on the right track to handle these situations effectively. .