Don’t Ask Your Friends These Money Questions (And What To Say Instead)

Let’s make one thing clear: Inviting friends to your dinner party It’s stupid to follow up on a Venmo request After the fact. But beyond this – should be –Obvious etiquette, money habits among friends, are often difficult areas to navigate. Stop being a dick in Venmo.) The correct way to send a split bill may seem obvious to you, but it’s different to your friend across the table.

Talking about money can be awkward, but it’s best to settle your issues with your friends now. Ultimately, these issues never go away, and unaddressed transgressions, over time, only lead to resentment and tension. Here are some common money expectations.

don’t give unsolicited advice

Even if you think your friend is crazy about money, avoid giving advice without asking directly. Consider whether you are making unwarranted comments that are not strictly “advice” but unwelcome innuendo. For example:

• Why don’t you ask your parents for that money?
• Would you like to shop at that other store?
• Want to invest in crypto?
• why not use [x type of bank account]?
• Want to pay off your student loans before interest rates rise again?

In general, avoid asking friends why they don’t do certain financial things. Especially if you don’t know all the details of your friend’s finances. unless your friend is in serious financial trouble Or if you’re asking for their opinion directly, it’s best to keep your mouth shut.

Have a bigger conversation about money

To avoid the example above and talk about money, tone is key.I still support you about how much you earnedTransparency is important. This is so that we can learn from each other’s money mistakes and ensure we are on the best possible financial footing.

If you’re idling your salary without prompts, It may come across as bragging, or at least offend others. Instead, try water and start a bigger conversation about money. Could you tell me what your income is?” The key here is to respect people’s boundaries if you obviously don’t want to have this conversation.But hopefully you’ll open the door To share realistic expectations and actionable tips in this economy.

Don’t assume your “wealthier” friends will pay

Whenever you make assumptions about who will pay without clear communication, there are no winners. It’s rude and annoying to think that if you earn less than your friend, they automatically get a bill. It may be insulting and intimidating to think.

And certainly, it is uncomfortable for friends who make more money to argue with friends who make less. You can’t assume you’ll find out indefinitely. All of this depends on your relationship with the person, so it’s best to communicate your stance here as clearly as possible.

give your friends a heads up

Whether you owe someone money or need to pay it back, do your best to verbally confirm when and how you need to send the money. As a general rule, sooner or later the outcome will be better for everyone involved. If you can be calm in the moment, that would be preferable to the uncertainty and forgetfulness that grows over time.

We can’t always pay off our debts quickly. If you have to wait until your next paycheck to pay someone, let them know. If that person is your friend, they will understand.

Bottom Line: Respect Boundaries

Like Oguni, every friend group has slightly different money habits.It avoids the resentment and discomfort that comes with varying expectations of money.And I encourage transparency among my friends. Maybe your friendship is more important than the $20 they may or may not owe you.