How guilt can actually help

It’s good to feel guilty after making a mistake. It means you have empathy. Our guilt can be spontaneous and unhelpful after we let ourselves go, like after. do not feel productive enoughGuilt can also be a powerful motivator to move on, such as when you haven’t been able to make time for someone you love.when finished apologized properly Whatever is causing that nasty pit in your stomach, it’s time to overcome your guilt and use it as a tool. Productive planning for change.

Use Guilt to Change for the Better

Just as stress is often a powerful motivator to get things done, guilt is a powerful emotion when it comes to making a change. I can give you the most heartfelt apology ever, but it won’t make sense if you don’t change your ways going forward.

Rather than apologizing too much, Or curl up in a ball of shame and stick to a plan of action. For example, if your source of guilt is the fact that you constantly cancel plans with people, make plans to keep your promises going forward. This means that you only schedule appointments that you know you can do.

Recognize what you can and cannot control

Using guilt as motivation also applies to more abstract and tricky problems. Take, for example, the guilt surrounding white privilege.One by one, the feelings of the beginning shame on your identity It helps you recognize the fact that you have privileges. On the other hand, self-loathing over things you can’t control doesn’t help.Here we look back at the words of the author Bell hook: “Privilege is not bad per se. What matters is what we do with it…we share resources and use privilege in a way that empowers the unprivileged.” We have to set a direction for how to do it.

Own the parts of yourself you can’t change and turn your discomfort into action. This can be teaching yourself where your privileges come from, donating to reputable causes that support marginalized groups, or speaking out against racism among friends, family, or co-workers. It may look like this.

Takeaway

The bright side of guilt is that it shines a light on things about ourselves that we know are inconsistent with our values. For example, you shouldn’t be ashamed to set the boundaries you want. But all too often, guilt is the result of making a real mistake, and it’s a sign that something needs to change.

Guilt is all-consuming, but when you recognize where it comes from, you can use it to grow and change. to move into action. And if you tend to constantly feel guilty about things you can’t control, consider investigating those feelings. professional help.